A Healthy Perspective In The Face of Chronic IllnessDo you know someone who is chronically (or terminally) ill but still seems to have the best attitude, and you think to yourself…how is that possible??

Or maybe YOU are the chronically ill person, and you just can’t fathom how to smile in the face of it all…I mean, how can you?

Well, I feel you, and I have one word for you:


How that person chooses to see his/her world (or how YOU choose to see your own experiences) affects their attitude toward life – and everything around it. This realization truly changed my life, which is why I wanted to share my thoughts with you today.

The dictionary defines the word perspective as “a particular attitude toward or way of regarding something; a point of view.” Jini has mentioned before that whatever you focus on grows, so why not take ownership of how you view things? That is what we will go over today, so let’s master the art of a healthy perspective together!

What is a Healthy Perspective?

A favorite quote of mine on the topic of perspective is this one:

“A healthy perspective can help individuals face difficult truths about their weaknesses, identify and build on strengths, and guide them to the intrinsic compassion for a powerful motivating force for growth and change.”

A good example of this is joy. Joy is said to be an internal quality that is unaffected by outside circumstances – so basically, it begins with you. That is where your story begins and ends, and it’s up to you to choose what lens to look out of.

Why This Can Be Challenging

I think a lot of people get stuck because they feel that experiences (especially bad ones) have just happened to them, which is an immediate victim mentality. This, for example, could be a situation in the past where you couldn’t do anything to stop/change it – or it could be something you currently can’t do anything about.

victim mentalityBut how can someone possibly move on, grow, and view the world through a different lens when they’re being hindered by this victim mentality?

Now in the case of something like childhood abuse, you probably couldn’t do something in that moment. You were just a child. However, you can do something now by means of changing your story moving forward – starting by changing your perspective.

I know it’s not always that simple, and you may be thinking, “But I can’t change this situation.” If the situation can’t be changed or fixed, it’s easy to take on a “why bother?” mentality.

“It’s not possible to think positively while I’m still dealing with ______.”

Here’s an example:

Maybe you’re currently stuck in a toxic relationship and don’t have the funds to leave. You feel that happiness is impossible because you need to save money first, and the problem can’t be solved otherwise until then. Sure, not having money is a physical reason you cannot leave – but you can still change your perspective for the better while you save up.

“I’m not in a positive environment now, but I can still look at this through a positive lens. I can save up my money, and I can take back my power.”

Fear and trauma stemming from the past actions of others may be blocking us, especially with chronic illness. In my personal experience, I had fear and trauma surrounding doctors because some of the ones I worked with had made me feel so powerless!

If I ever experience these feelings now, I like to say to myself: “There’s no need to hold onto this anymore, it serves no purpose for me.”

This is really helpful because our minds and bodies may be holding onto painful experiences, but when we see how detrimental this is to our healing – that this only hurts us – we can try to let go.

There have been MANY situations that were out of my control, and I’m sure the same goes for you! But control over external circumstances is not the end game. You always have the ability to maintain your internal safety and power. That way no power is given to any external/outside issues.

It’s also important to toss away the “I can’t until _____ resolves” pattern of thinking. More often than not, we’re blocking any future/positive possibilities by maintaining this limited way of thinking. Really, we’re just putting ourselves in a box this way! Maybe once we change our outlook, we can see things more clearly, doors will open, and more possibilities/solutions will arise.

Even if things don’t change…wouldn’t it be better to live a life feeling full than not living until a problem is fixed?

How Fear Can Get in the Way

Let’s dive into this topic of fear…

Fear is the opposite of love.

It can destroy love.

And those who have healthy perspectives are full of LOVE.

Love of self, others, animals, and life.

They are grateful for each experience.

If you have fear, stress, and anxiety clouding your perspective, don’t worry – I think most of us do! And definitely don’t beat yourself up about it.

loveWhen you are confident and safe in your own body, then it doesn’t matter what happens. You can maintain the perspective you choose. And, if something stressful happens, you can go back to this place of safety and love within yourself.

Since a lot of our resistance in creating a healthy perspective may stem from fear, creating safety around yourself and your body is extremely important. When you’re comfortable in your own skin as they say (which is another way of saying safe), you can be who you want to be – and a healthy outlook usually always follows!

Ask yourself: What makes you feel safe? What makes you feel calm and stress-free? What person/place/item/food helps you feel alive? How can you incorporate more of this into your life?

This tapping session with Jini really helped me.

What Jini says about this session: “If you don’t have the health, money, relationship, or career that you want, as you’re tapping your way through your blocks & saboteurs, you need to also take a look at your fear of success.”

Initially, you may need to use external factors to provide a feeling of safety, such as a warm compress, a hot cup of tea, cuddles with your pet or significant other, etc. But after a while, you will be able to find this comfort within yourself. You can tap into that and know you are OK, and that you’re going to be OK. This guided meditation is also super helpful – in it, Jini helps you connect deeply with your body.

Very successful people make sure to do something they enjoy each day. This is self-care hack that proves you respect and love your body, and that you are giving it what it wants. If you do practice one act of self-care daily, especially if you start your day on that note, how can you not carry a sense of contentment with you through the day?

Now your healthy perspective can come from within, as you have made sure to make yourself a priority.

Perspective checklist:

Let’s run through this awesome perspective checklist I grabbed from this article:

1.) Look at your problem in the context of your entire life. Ask yourself: How important is this difficulty in the overall scheme of things? What will this matter ten years from now? Okay, so you have a leak in your bathroom. It won’t significantly affect the rest of your life. Or, let’s say a prospective sale falls through. Sure, you’re disappointed, but it isn’t the end of the world. The key is to see the problem for what it is – and not let it dominate your thinking for an entire day, week, or month.

2.) Wake up to the miracles all around you. Whether you realize it or not, you are part of an extraordinary universe. Spectacular, mind-boggling things are happening every second. For instance, you breathe, your heart beats, and you digest food all without any conscious effort. Tulips know when to pop up through the ground at precisely the right time each and every year. The earth rotates, the sun rises and sets, the seasons change. All part of a wondrous, never-ending cycle.

3.) View every problem as an opportunity for growth. Too often, we see our difficulties as negative experiences which are there to punish us and cause pain. As you look back on your life, you’ll find that many problems and painful situations led to personal growth and improved conditions. Maybe you lost a job which in turn led you to a better position. Or a relationship ended but you wound up in a more fulfilling one. So, develop a strong belief that the “bad” experience is there to help you in some way. Don’t curse your challenge; instead, look for the lessons or opportunities which your problems are showing you.

4.) Put yourself in physical surroundings where you can “get away” from everyday stress. Changing your environment can give you a fresh, relaxed point of view. Maybe you like to sit on the beach or take a walk in the woods. Find scenery which allows you to release tension and think creatively – and go there as much as possible.

5.) Simplify your life and restore balance. Easy to say, but not so easy to implement. Sometimes, we get overextended, taking on too many responsibilities or projects. We ignore loved ones and even our own health. So, maybe it’s time to say “NO” to the next project or demand on your time. Which is really more important, another volunteer committee assignment or spending time with your children?


Resiliency can help us maintain a healthy perspective as well, however, resilience can’t be forced! I appreciate how perfectly this article stated it:

“Like building a muscle, increasing your resilience takes time and intentionality. Focusing on four core components—connection, wellness, healthy thinking, and meaning—can empower you to withstand and learn from difficult and traumatic experiences.”

Resilience is something you build over time, little by little as you experience the ups and downs of life. Resiliency is bouncing back, but also maintaining a healthy perspective!

Final Thoughts

If you’re like me, and you find strength in inspirational quotes, check out this link with 50 quotes on perspective. 🙂

We can end with a thought from the lovely Oprah:

“Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.” ― Oprah Winfrey